Before we fall, p.5
Before We Fall, page 5
“Not going to happen, Sheriff. Others have tried.”
“I’m not them, Junie. I’m me, and when my fingers are pounding your pussy, fucking you, or hell, any part of my body is giving you pleasure, you use my damn name. Now say it or this is over before we begin.”
“Ben,” she moans, her eyes closing with pleasure.
“Good girl. God you feel so good. I can already feel how your muscles are trembling around me. You’re ready to come aren’t you, Junie?”
“Yes,” she whimpers.
I push her bra up, her tit falling into my hand as I seek out her nipple and begin to torture it. My fingers have set up a rhythm now, fucking her hard and slow.
“Oh…” she gasps her eyes opening to look at me as my thumb grinds against her clit, while I tunnel in and out.
“You like that?”
“More,” she begs and hell if she only knew how much I want to give her more. “Fuck, Ben, I’m going to come,” she purrs.
She didn’t need to tell me, because I can feel it.
“Please God, tell me I can kiss you. Give me something here, Baby. You feel so good and my cock is dying,” I groan, unwilling to take what I want, just in case she still has issues.
She doesn’t respond, instead, she slams her lips against mine, her tongue thrusting into my mouth, taking the kiss I so desperately wanted to give. My hand moves from her breast, to wrap into her hair, twirling that long tail of hair around and around and using it to hold her mouth in place as I take over the kiss.
Our tongues mate, war, and fight but finally she gives in and lets me have control. I pick up my speed, finger fucking her harder as she comes, soaking my digits and squeezing them so fucking tight that my cock is pushing against my jeans in jealousy. I keep fucking her relentlessly, driving my fingers into her over and over, and letting her ride out her orgasm.
I pull away from her lips and take my hand away, only when I’m sure she’s finished. Her eyes open just in time to watch me lick her cream from my fingers.
“Someday soon, Junie, it’s going to be my head between your legs, and I’m going to lick that juicy little pussy of yours clean,” I tell her once I finish.
“Not for a while,” she says, taking a breath that shudders through her body. She adjusts her bra and shirt, then buttons her pants and she does all of this without truly looking at me.
“Oh, it will be soon,” I promise her, hating that we have to end it now.
“Not likely. You just did a really good job of scratching my itch. I probably won’t need you again for another year. Maybe never if I keep a fresh supply of batteries and find a replacement first. Heck, maybe I’ll give Zeke another go,” she announces and then moves away from the fridge.
“You try it and you’ll regret it, Junie,” I warn her.
“I can’t regret it more than the fact I just gave into you. Our song has been sung, Sheriff. It’s over now.”
“Not on your life, Baby.”
“I’ll let you fill up the coolers on your own. I suddenly have a giant headache,” she mumbles walking away.
That seems to be a familiar refrain. It seems Juniper Sellers is always walking away from me. Somehow, I got to find a way to stop that.
Chapter Ten
Junie
I’m so fucking stupid. I flop down on my bed, covering my face up with both hands. I can’t believe I did that.
In my brother’s garage! With the door opened!
Christ. What would I have done if Joshua and his buddies had found us? Or Gavin?
Yikes.
I lose my head around Ben. There’s no other way to say it. I practically ran away too, which I hate. It screams of weakness, but there was no way I could act normal with Ben around after what just happened. I begged out with a migraine. Luna and Gavin both looked at me strange, but they didn’t push the issue. I was gone before Ben ever came back out of the garage. I know Big Brother will have some questions, and they will be questions that I have no intention of ever answering.
Eventually I stretch and as I lock down the embarrassment, the shame, and the disbelief of what I just did, I also admit that it felt fucking amazing. I stretch like a cat, and barely contain my purring. It could definitely be said that Sheriff Kingston knows how to use his fingers… and Lord have mercy, that dirty talking mouth of his.
Still, I’ve been burned so many times I have permanent scars. It’s not wise letting Ben in to hurt me again.
And he could.
I talk a good game, but the truth is my relationship with Shred left me in tatters. I’m just now starting to see daylight, and I know that has a lot to do with the counseling I’m still receiving. It began because of the kidnapping, but my troubles went a lot deeper than that. If Ben knew how messed up in the head I was, he’d probably take off running in the opposite direction. That’s probably a good reason to tell him about it, but something stops me. Sadly, I know what that something is…
I like him.
Maybe as much or more than I did before. Probably more, because Ben is coming on stronger and I like it. He makes me feel… special. Hell, maybe even beautiful.
I jerk when my phone buzzes from the nightstand where I put it when I got home.
* * *
I miss you.
I smile at the text from Ben. I never took his number out of my contacts. Apparently, he kept mine too. That information shouldn’t make me feel as good as it does.
I stare at the message a little longer, wondering if it would be smart to reply.
Ben:
How’s that itch? Do you want me to come over and scratch it?
I giggle, looking up at the ceiling. I’m really in trouble with this guy. I bring my phone up to reply.
Me:
I’m good. Don’t you need to go eat a hamburger or something?
I hit send and wait. I also do it while I’m grinning, because I know whatever Ben says next will make me laugh and maybe that’s one of the reasons I like him so much. I never had much laughter in my life.
Ben:
I’d rather be eating you.
I was right. He does make me laugh. There’s also a sweet pang of need that hits me in my stomach. How he can make me want him so easily, I don’t understand.
Me:
I’ve got to go now, Sheriff.
I send the text, shaking my head.
Ben:
Make sure your doors are locked.
Me:
Are you going to be my daddy now?
Ben:
Baby, if you like it, I’m game.
Me:
Goodbye, Sheriff.
Ben:
See you real soon, Junie.
* * *
I read his last text, biting on my lip and resisting the urge to tell him to come over. I’m about to put it over on the nightstand when it rings. I roll my eyes. It figures he would call. It’s easier to resist when I don’t have to hear his voice.
“Seriously, keep it up and Gavin will know what you’re up to. I don’t think either one of us are ready for that conversation,” I say into the phone once I answer—not even bothering with hello.
There’s no sarcastic comeback, no Ben telling me he’s coming over and I better let him in, and no demand to move my hand between my legs and touch myself—which now that I think about it, I’d really like.
There’s nothing… but silence.
Crap. I didn’t even look to see who called. If it was Luna, Joshua… shit or the bar… At least I didn’t mention Ben’s name.
“Hello?” I respond more cautiously.
Silence.
I pull the phone back to look at the number and it just says, “Unknown Caller”. Whoever it is, I’ve probably freaked them out.
“Hellloooo,” I call out into the phone, drawing the word out to try and get them to respond, but I get nothing. I can hear the faint sound of breathing, and I know they’re there, but they’re not going to talk, so I hang up. I toss my phone against the mattress and decide to go take a shower. I promise myself I’ll do it without thinking of Ben and getting myself off.
But I know I’m lying.
Chapter Eleven
Ben
“What’s the deal between you and Junie?”
“No idea what you’re talking about,” I lie, refusing to look Lodge in the eyes.
“Bullshit. Don’t piss me off, Kingston. I want to know what in the fuck is going on with you and Junie. She practically ran to her car yesterday to get away from you.”
“You really have no idea how to talk to your superiors do you?” I thump myself on the chest and use a gruff, ‘caveman’ type of voice. “Me sheriff, you deputy.”
“You idiot,” he says mimicking me. “Now tell me what’s going on.”
“This is going to be hard for you to understand, Lodge, but my relationship with Junie is none of your business.”
“The hell it’s not. She’s my sister. You need to leave her the fuck alone.”
“She might be your sister, but if things go the way I want, she’s going to be my woman, and I don’t give a damn how you feel about that. So back away and let Junie and me work this out.”
“You just can’t stop yourself from going after the women in my life, can you Kingston?”
“Trust me, if I knew Luna was still hung up on you, I would have never tried to go there. And I’ll remind you that it had been thirteen years. At the time, she wasn’t “your” anything.”
“Luna’s always been mine. We just lost our way,” the bastard says, sitting in his seat and stretching out so his feet are on the desk. His smile is one of satisfaction, and I may not be carrying a torch for Luna anymore, but it takes all I have not to kick his seat so the fucker falls on his ass. I roll my eyes instead.
“Whatever. Tell me again why I put up with you, Lodge?”
“I ask the same thing daily about you, Kingston. I reckon it’s because without me you’d probably get killed or something. I always did have a soft spot for mangey strays.”
“Fuck you,” I mutter with a grin as I flip him off—which of course just makes him laugh.
“We’re going to have to talk about you and my sister, Kingston.”
“No, we won’t. Whatever happens is between Junie and me. You’re not involved.”
“Junie isn’t as tough as you think she is, Kingston.”
“I know exactly who Junie is. I also know she’s been dealing with her issues. I let her do that for a fucking year, Lodge. I’m done waiting.”
“A year? What have you been doing for a year?” he asks, watching my face closely. The asshole probably expects me to say I was grieving Luna. Fuck, I don’t know what he expects, but nothing could be further from the truth.
“I’ve been waiting for her.”
“You’ve been waiting for her?”
“That’s the condensed version,” I tell him, bringing my coffee cup up to my lips and taking a drink. I swear he’s ruining my caffeine intake. I really should kick him off balance, so he’d fall just for that fact alone.
“Then maybe you should un-condense it?”
“I didn’t figure you’d want to hear how I jacked off to thoughts of your sister naked, but if you want to go there…” I leave my threat with a shrug. I’m rewarded slightly when Lodge’s joking demeanor is washed from his face. I was trying to piss him off. I have hope I did that, until he opens his big fat mouth again.
“You really haven’t been mooning over my wife this whole time?”
“Jesus, fuck, if you thought that then why in the hell did you agree to come to work here? Or keep inviting me to shit, Lodge? You really are a special kind of stupid.”
“I just thought it’d be good to get you out so you could see Luna had moved on,” he mutters, and I shake my head, putting my coffee down on my desk.
“So you’ve been doing all that shit just to show me that you got the girl?”
“Not the way you’re thinking. Hell, you were barely getting out of the house. I thought if you could see that life went on, you’d get out there and find a good woman.”
I think back over the football games and the quick lunches at the diner that he practically had to drag my ass too, after Junie first walked out. There was always some friend of Luna’s there. I barely noticed them at the time, and I didn’t go out of my way to talk to them either. But now that I think back on it, they were single.
“Jesus, you were trying to set me up.”
“Well, that was more Luna than me, but I vetted the women. They looked like good women on paper and none of them were Luna, but they weren’t mud-butt ugly either. So…” he shrugs.
“Mud-butt? Jesus. You really are a fucking asshole, Lodge.”
“Hey, I was trying to help. If I had known you were going home and jacking off to my sister, I would have killed you.”
“You could have tried.”
“Whatever,” he mutters, taking another drink of his coffee.
“You going to try it now?” I ask, mildly interested in his laidback reaction.
“Nah. Junie could use some good in her life, and you may piss me off and ugly up my day, but you’re a decent asshole.”
“Gee, thanks,” I mutter.
“If you hurt her though, I’ll kill you. She’s had enough pain, and I didn’t help her, because she didn’t let me know about it in time. Now, I see her every day, so I will know if you fuck with her. You do and there won’t be any saving you—friendship or not.”
I ignore his threats, but my mind zeros in on Lodge talking about her past.
“You going to tell me what happened?” I ask.
“Fuck, no. That’s not my story to tell. If Junie wants you to know, she’ll tell you.”
“At least tell me, did it involve her hole-in-the-brain giant rat of an ex-boyfriend?”
Lodge throws his head back and laughs. “Is that how Junie described him?”
“Fuck no. That’s me. What kind of shit for brains changes his name to the same as that giant rat on Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles?”
Lodge—the asshole—keeps laughing. “Apparently he’s a big time guitar player and thought the name was catchy.”
“Big time?”
“He played for some big names. His last gig was with Ryker Lane.”
“Fuck, what kind of people did Junie hang with?” I ask, starting to wonder if she could be happy with a small-town sheriff.
“Again, not my secret. I guess I better get up and go on patrol, since you’re sitting on your ass all morning.”
“If you want, you could put a good word in with your sister for me,” I suggest, already knowing the dick won’t.
“She making you work for it, is she?” Lodge laughs, getting up and thus robbing me of the chance to kick his chair out from under him… Damn it.
“You could say that,” I grumble.
“That’s my girl,” Lodge praises and then walks out of the room without a backward glance.
I’m left alone suddenly worrying if Junie could ever be happy here, after hanging around with country music superstars before. It seems I do have a type.
Women who have a past I can’t overcome…
Chapter Twelve
Junie
“Luna—”
“Don’t you Luna me! You and Ben totally are doing the mattress mambo.”
“We aren’t. I can promise you, whatever else you think, we are definitely not doing the mattress mambo.”
“Well, hell. That’s disappointing.”
“You get why this is weird talking to you about, right?” I remind her, because it is weird. It’s even worse because when it mattered way back when, Ben said Luna’s name. I’ve mostly let that go, and what Ben said makes sense. I can almost understand him saying Luna’s name in his sleep, but it doesn’t make it hurt any less though, and that’s just the damn truth. And, late at night, I lay in bed and wonder if he wasn’t thinking of her while touching me. If he didn’t say her name because he wanted me to be her….
“Please, that was a lifetime ago,” Luna says sipping her drink and waving her hand at me like I’m insane. Maybe I am, but what if I’m not? And that’s the real reason I ignored Ben’s texts for two days. Because after dreaming about him and reliving everything the evening after the barbecue, I just don’t think I should be opening myself up to hurt again. I’ve had a hard time learning from my mistakes—and I’ve made huge ones. I don’t need to be making more. It’s time I pull up my big girl panties and be logical and smart in my decisions. Ben is not smart.
“It may seem a lifetime to you. You have Gavin, and you two are deliriously happy.”
“Junie—”
“That wasn’t me being bitchy, Luna. I’m legit happy for you and my brother. You two deserve happiness more than anyone I know. Gavin is so different with you back in his life, and I love it. I’ll always be grateful to you for giving my brother happiness and the life he always wanted.”
“I’m the one that’s grateful, Junie. Losing Gavin the way I did nearly destroyed me. I was only existing before he came back, and I didn’t even know it,” she says and for just the merest of seconds a darkness flashes across her face, and if I had any doubts that she was telling the truth—which I absolutely don’t—I would know it just by looking at her.
“You two are really lucky. Love isn’t that easy for everyone, Luna.”
“I wouldn’t exactly call mine and Gavin’s love story easy, Junie,” she replies gently, reminding me of the hell they’ve been through.
“True, I’m sorry. I just meant, not everyone gets a happy ever after.”
“Maybe, maybe not. Maybe some give up too soon,” she replies with a pointed look at me.
“Luna, I’ve spent most of my life with men who never put me first and hurt me. I don’t want that anymore. I’d rather be alone.”
