Before we fall, p.2
Before We Fall, page 2
“Yep. Made the offer again tonight before the game,” she confirms.
“That’s awesome! Why isn’t he doing it?” I ask, exasperated.
“Because Gavin and Ben overruled me and Josh seemed to agree,” Luna pouts.
“That’s bullshit,” I grumble, turning my attention back to the game.
It’s Friday night and that means we’re all at Stone Lake High’s football field watching my nephew be amazing and scoring touchdowns like the superstar he is. It’s a normal occurrence, because my nephew is awesome and also because Stone Lake is Stone Lake and there’s not much to do on a Friday night. People are usually at one of three places. The football field being the top choice, followed closely by Cliffside Restaurant—although to be fair most show up there after the game—and then drinking at my tavern.
That last one I’m pretty grateful for, since it puts money in my pocket. I feel a little guilty for not being there tonight, but I would never miss Josh’s game. Nothing could make me do that, not even sitting with my brother, Luna and… Ben. It’s freaking weird, but somehow that’s where we’re at. In the year that’s passed since I walked out of Ben’s bedroom a lot of changes have been made. The biggest one being that Ben, Gavin, and Luna have kind of morphed into this easy friendship that centers on their love for my nephew. Gavin even started working at the Sheriff’s department with Ben. Being around Luna doesn’t seem to bother Ben and if it does, he at least manages to keep it hidden from my brother, so I guess it’s all cool.
Ben and I are a different story. We talk when we see each other out in public. We get along and are cordial. When it’s just the two of us, he seems to enjoy baiting me, but I can live with that, since we’re barely ever alone. Part of that reason is I take great pains not to let that happen. Every now and then I break down, like the other night at my place when I was checking out tables when it was slow and went to his to help the waitress. I’d like to say it was because I was just making sure everyone was happy that night and Ben was just any customer. Maybe part of it is that, but I can’t deny that I’m still drawn to Ben, even a year later. Then again, I never had a lick of sense when it came to men and still being attracted to Ben, after everything that has gone on, is proof of that.
“It’s not bullshit, Junie. It’s football,” Gavin laughs. I look up at my older brother and for a minute, everything else pales into comparison. He’s smiling, relaxed, and happy in a way that was never usual until Luna came back in his life, and in a way that I’ll never get tired of seeing. He’s wearing a kickass Metallica t-shirt, faded jeans, and his blue eyes, which are just like mine, sparkle in a way you just know that he smiles often and laughs even more. If I didn’t already love, Luna, I’d love her even more for that.
“He clotheslined him!”
For some reason, Gavin and Ben find this hilarious. I cross my arms at my chest, half turn in a nonverbal fuck you, and direct my attention back to the game.
“Are you really going out with Zeke tomorrow night?” Luna asks a little later.
I feel my body tense up as all eyes are directed at me. I take a breath and try to act like I’m not freaking out. “Where did you hear that?”
* * *
“You’ve been in Stone Lake long enough to know the answer to that,” Luna says.
She’s right of course, I do. Miriam Sparks spreads gossip faster than the winning horse at the Kentucky Derby. She also happens to be Zeke Newsome’s aunt. I really should have thought about that before accepting.
“It’s not a date, really,” I mutter, refusing to blush. I also don’t look at Luna, Gavin, or Ben. I keep my eyes on the field. “We’re just going out for pizza.”
“On a Saturday night. I don’t know how they do it in Nashville or even California, but around here, Junie, that’s a date,” Luna explains, being ever so helpful.
I shrug. “I guess. My counselor feels I need to get out more,” I mumble. “Zeke is the first guy that asked that doesn’t make me feel like I want to stab my eyes out.”
Luna laughs. “Well he is hot.”
“Luna—” Gavin growls in a voice so deep that heck if he wasn’t my brother, I’d even find the primal sound sexy. I know Luna does by the way she curves into him.
“I was just noticing, Gavin. I’m married, not dead.”
“Maybe old Zeke needs to be dead,” Gavin mutters, squeezing Luna to him.
“Maybe you should not threaten someone when the sheriff is sitting next to you,” Luna chastises.
I don’t mean to, but I look over at Ben. He’s staring right at me. His face is unreadable, but then, maybe he doesn’t have a reaction. What we were doing together happened a year ago and he was more or less using me to get over a heartbreak. I turn my attention back to the game.
“No one is going to hurt Zeke. He’s a nice guy and we’re friends. We’re going out for pizza, not getting married,” I remind them.
“Well, I think it’s awesome! You want me to come over and fix your hair? Help you pick out something to wear?”
“Babe,” Gavin mumbles, a smile pulling on his lips.
“What? I’m just offering to help.”
“Thanks, Luna, but I’m good. It’s really not a big deal.”
“Still, we could make you look—”
“There’s nothing wrong with the way Junie looks. She’s beautiful. Zeke’s a lucky asshole that she’s even giving him the time of day.”
Luna’s eyes widen. She looks at me and she mouths some words without saying them out loud—but, I read them. “Oh my God.”
* * *
I sigh. I may have to kill a sheriff. Luna won’t let this go and if she tries to matchmake the two of us, I’m going to go ballistic. Not to mention the part that he’s using my nickname again. Yeah…. I may have to kill Sheriff Kingston.
Chapter Three
Ben
“What was that bullshit back there?” Junie hisses at me once Gavin and Luna take off. Gavin was looking at me funny, and I figure that’s going to be a fucking problem, but I’ll worry about it tomorrow. There’s definitely more important things to handle right now. For one, Juniper Sellers going out on a date.
“You’re dating?” I growl.
Her head goes back and then her eyes narrow. “We are not talking about this,” she huffs, turning away from me.
“I think we should.”
“Well you should think again. What I do and who I do it with is not any of your business, Sheriff.”
“Bullshit. We’ve been playing this game for over a year now, Junie. I gave you space to get your shit straightened out, but we both know that’s all this has been.”
“Get my shit straightened out?” she gasps, her entire body rigid and her face flushed with anger.
“I didn’t stutter, Junie,” I growl, knowing I’m just going to piss her off, but the thought of her dating someone is fucking with my head. I screwed up. I know it, and I’ve given her space, but damn it, I still want her. I feel like I’ve always wanted her. I also know that with the way I fucked up, she won’t believe a damn thing I say.
“You’re either delusional, crazy as hell, or stupid. I’m guessing you’re all three.” Her voice rumbles because she’s trying to stay quiet enough so that the people milling around us can’t hear us argue. Even though she’s angry, she’s hot as hell.
“We have unfinished business, Junie.”
“No,” she denies, shaking her head back and forth. “Absolutely not. We do not have unfinished business, Sheriff. Our business ended when I was in bed with you and you were dreaming about my sister-in-law.”
“Don’t go on that date tomorrow, Junie. If you’re healed up enough to move on, I’m standing right here.”
“If I’m healed up enough… You really are an asshole. I didn’t bring anyone else to the bed we were sharing, Sheriff. You did.”
“Bullshit. You know as well as I do that your head was full of shit that you needed to work through.”
“You’re right.”
“So, if you’ve finally worked—”
“The difference is that I wasn’t trying to use you to replace anyone. I think we can both agree that you can’t say the same.”
“Junie—”
“Leave me alone, Sheriff. Maybe you mean well, I have no idea. But what I do know is I don’t want a man who sees me as second best to my sister-in-law. I’m getting my life back together, and I’d appreciate it if you’d let me do that without causing me more bullshit,” she says, her voice cold. Then, she turns and walks away.
I watch her strut away, remembering the last time I let her do that. The difference is back then my head was fucked up, and I let her go so we both could get our shit straight. Now, I know what I want. If Junie thinks I’m going to step aside and let her see another man, she better think again.
It’s not happening. No freaking way.
Chapter Four
Junie
“I’m feeling a little guilty, Junie.”
I look up at Zeke and smile. He actually is a sweet guy. He’s sweet, nice, and good looking too. I’m also really relaxed around him, and I wasn’t expecting that at all. So, basically, tonight has been really nice. We went to a movie and watched the latest action flick starring The Rock. Afterwards, we ended up at Cliffside eating. The conversation has been general and easy and that also surprises me. I don’t usually do that well talking one on one with people these days, but Zeke makes it easy.
He works on a lobster boat, which means he’s tanned and bronzed by the sun, and the man is blessed with so many muscles that my head spins when I try to take them in. I feel like a tiny doll standing around him. He’s wearing a red and green flannel shirt that somehow manages to enclose his muscles without ripping. He has a white shirt on under that. I can see just a hint of it from the opened buttons of his flannel. Soft faded jeans and boots finish the look out. He’s definitely all man.
I could really like him. There’s just one small problem.
It feels like I’m talking to Gavin. There’s no sparks whatsoever and that really sucks, because I find myself wishing there was.
“Why do you feel guilty?”
“It seems I’ve told you all about me but know very little about you. I think I asked the wrong questions,” he responds, and I smile.
“Maybe I’m just boring,” I suggest, pushing around the lobster mac and cheese on my plate.
“Now that, I don’t believe for a minute,” he says, smiling at me. He’s got brown eyes, but they’re not deep in color like Ben’s, and they don’t sparkle when he smiles.
“I’m just—”
“Hey, Zeke.”
My head jerks up when I hear Ben’s voice. I look in the direction of the sound and see him striding toward us. He’s wearing his uniform and strutting in here like he owns the place. I wish I could say he doesn’t look good. He does, but I’m still going to kill him.
“Hey, Ben. What are you up to?”
“Thought I’d drop by and pick up supper. I’m not much on cooking.”
“I hear you,” Zeke responds.
I put my fork down, bring my arms up to plant my elbows on the table, and form a pyramid with my arms. I join my hands and wait to see what the sheriff thinks he’s doing.
“Well hello, Juniper. I didn’t see you there,” Ben says, and he’s grinning at me. His eyes are sparkling, and I find myself wondering what he would like with lobster mac and cheese dripping down his face and splattered on his uniform.
“Sheriff,” I respond my voice tight.
“I have to admit, I was surprised to see you here tonight, Zeke, what with the call I got. But, then, I suppose having Juniper here is a good enough reason.”
“What kind of call?” Zeke asks, and I narrow my eyes at Ben, because he’s up to something.
“It just came through dispatch about thirty minutes ago. Two of my deputies went to check it out. There was vandalism at the dock tonight. Three boats were involved. I can’t say for sure, but I’d almost swear that Danny said yours was one.”
“Fuck.”
“Hopefully, it’s okay. I suppose you could check it out in the morning. It’d be bad though if it was your boat and all your equipment was unprotected…”
“Christ, Junie, I need to go check it out. I’m so sorry,” Zeke says, and when I look at him it’s all I can do not to call Ben on his shit.
“I’ll go with you,” I tell him, sneaking Ben a fuck-you look.
“You sure you don’t mind? I—”
“I can’t really speak for you, Zeke, but the last time Danny reported in, the scene was a mess, and the people responsible were still on the loose. I wouldn’t want you to risk taking Juniper out there and getting her hurt.”
“Yeah, you’re right. I’ll just take you home, Junie. Maybe we can do this again soon,” Zeke says, obviously worried about his boat.
“Go now. I’ll get home. I’ll call Patty from the bar to come and get me. She won’t mind,” I tell Zeke, smiling reassuringly. All the while, I am planning the death of one sheriff.
“No, I couldn’t do that. And you haven’t even finished dinner. Shit, Junie. I’ll just go after you’re done, and I’ll take you home.”
“There’s no need in that. You go on. I’ll give Juniper a ride home in my squad car when she’s done eating,” Ben volunteers—the asshole.
“Is that okay, Junie?” Zeke asks, clearly worried. He’s such a good guy. Of course on the flipside of that, he’s probably dumber than a bucket of rocks. I don’t see how anyone could buy this cock and bull story that Ben is weaving.
“It’s fine. Don’t worry about me,” I tell him, a forced smile on my lips.
“Only if you’re positive.”
“Zeke, go. I’m fine. Promise.”
Zeke reaches over and squeezes my hand. “I’ll make it up to you,” he says and then he’s moving toward the exit. I hate to tell him that I doubt I’ll let him make anything up to me.
Once he leaves, my head jerks around as Ben yells out, “Hey, Karen? Just serve my takeout here. I’ll eat in tonight.”
“You got it, Ben,” she calls back.
“What do you think you’re doing?” I ask him as he settles into the seat that Zeke left.
He’s stacking up Zeke’s dishes and sets them aside as he answers. “Cleaning up a place to eat. I promised Zeke after all. You wouldn’t want me to lie would you, Juniper?” He’s grinning and obviously proud of himself.
I really might have to kill him.
Chapter Five
Ben
“Are you proud of yourself?” Junie asks, and she’s pissed, but I’d like to think she finds it funny too. At least she’s not stomping out of here and refusing to talk to me. I think that’s progress.
“I don’t know what you mean, Juniper,” I lie.
“Will you quit calling me that?” she mutters.
“Does that mean I can call you Junie again?”
“I don’t know, have your balls been infested with sand fleas and your dick fallen off?”
“Ouch, you’re vicious,” I tell her, wincing a little at her description. Hell, I’m resisting the urge to put my hand between my legs and shield my boys. “Especially for someone who told me she didn’t hold a grudge.”
“I don’t have to hold a grudge to be pissed off when a man calls out another woman’s name when he’s in bed with me, Ben.”
“So, you admit you’re still pissed at me, even a year later?”
She looks at me and there are different emotions moving over her face. I let her stare, because I’m staring back. I’ve missed her. She brought something sweet into my life, and it might have been fleeting, but as fucked up as I was, I knew it was special. So special that in the year that followed, while I was digging my head out of my ass, it wasn’t Luna on my mind at all. It wasn’t Luna that I grieved. It was not not being able to pick up the phone to call Junie and have her give me a sarcastic kick in the ass, that I knew would leave me laughing. It was not hearing Junie’s laugh, touching her face, or just being near her. I mean, I’m a man, so I fucking missed the sexual things we did too, but it’s the other stuff that haunted me. I’m not sure how someone you spent such a short time with becomes so important to you, but it happened with Junie, and I’ve been left in a holding pattern waiting for her to give me an opportunity. Hearing she was going on a date threw me for a damn loop. If she’s looking for a man in her life, then motherfucker, I’m going to be that man.
Somehow.
“Okay, Sheriff. What is all this about?”
“What do you mean?”
“Why are you here? Why did you send poor Zeke out on a wild goose chase—”
“To be fair, there was vandalism out at the old dock tonight,” I reply with a shrug. Hell, even this conversation where I seem to be on a chess board with Junie trying to outwit her is more fun than I can remember having since the day she walked out my door.
“Why don’t I believe you?” she mutters, shaking her head, but she picks up her fork and starts eating. I figure that is at least a minor win.
“Because you’re a jaded woman who has trust issues?”
“I trusted you once,” she says with a smile that is as hard as it is sarcastic.
“Fair enough, I suppose. But, let me ask you something, Junie.”
“Go ahead, but I’m warning you once I finish my meal, I’m out of here, so you better speak fast.”
“Here’s your food, Ben. You need a refill or anything, Junie?”
“Nah, Karen, I’m good. Thank you, though.”
“Anytime. I brought you tea, Ben. But—”
“Tea is good,” I tell her waving her off.
“I figured. You haven’t had dinner inside in a bit, but tea is what you used to drink when you and Luna would come in, back in the day.”
