Nameless, p.7
Nameless, page 7
With those words my choice was made. I’d done this. I had to fix it.
I took a deep breath to fill my lungs with bravery. Savoured its rank edge in case it was my last. Then I unravelled my body from its hiding place and on legs like trembling jelly I trod the damp ground towards the patrol.
Their backs were turned. A moment. Two. Then one swivelled and snapped his gun high. ‘Halt. Stay where you are.’
Didn’t the fool know they meant one and the same?
The other soldiers also faced me with lifted guns and I stopped and raised my hands. One patter and I’d be like the woman in the hedge, and now that that option was aimed at my face I knew I didn’t want it.
You might ask if I had any plan apart from a demonstration of bravery that would become stupidity with the twitch of a finger on a trigger.
I did have a plan. As simple as the time its hatching demanded.
Distraction.
Not outstanding, I know, but a start I could build on. While they were busy with my distraction they weren’t going to the island and if that distraction became a real pain in the ass then they’d be even busier. As pains in the ass went, I could be truly outstanding.
‘Who are you? Name!’
I told him. Ever so obliging.
A peppering of questions.
‘What are you doing here? You know the forest is off limits.’
‘Where are you from?’
‘Is that your boat?’
‘What’s on those islands?’
A shaky shrug as I answered the last. ‘Nothing as far as I know. I saw the boat like you did and thought I’d use it to escape.’
The leader smiled. ‘No escape for you now, is there. Now you’re coming with us. You’re a bit old but not too ugly. And you look strong…she should last a bit longer than some of the other whores we’ve got, don’t you think, boys?’
Grins and nods and eyes assessing. The leader leaned close. Gun a flagpole near his ear. Voice soft and breath sour.
‘They die so easily, you see,’ he murmured. ‘But at least they die happy. Screaming their pleasure over and over to finally be taken by real men.’
Eldest’s face. Eldest’s body ravaged by these animals. I launched myself at the man with a guttural cry and fingers curled into claws.
But another soldier’s gun swung to his shoulder as he grabbed me. He twisted my arms hard behind my back and I cried out in pain.
‘The Invader will enjoy you,’ grinned the leader. ‘He likes a bit of fight. He can always cover your face.’
‘I’ll rip his balls off and shove them down his fucking throat,’ I snarled. Then I spat at him. Perfectly aimed so it gobbed on his lips. Disgusting and so satisfying.
He swore. Wiped it away with a terse swipe of his hand that then came down hard and flat on my face in a slap that jerked my head to one side. But I snapped my gaze right back to him. Spat again, this time the blood that filled my mouth. But my lips were numb so most of it just dribbled down my chin.
‘What’s on the islands?’ he demanded. The machine gun pushed close to my face and my arms were dragged tighter from behind.
‘Trees by the looks,’ I said. Obliging had gone down the toilet with a gurgle and now I was provoking them. And I didn’t give a shit.
The gun pushed against my cheek. Angled upwards hard into the bone. ‘Do you think I’m stupid?’
‘Yes, a stupid, depraved rapist and murderer who should be put against a wall and shot like the fucking animal you are.’
The man turned the gun and hit me with its butt. Pain exploded in my head. I fell to my knees but was dragged upright again and my vision wavered and I thought I might vomit. Retched, let it drip from my lips to the ground. Deep breaths. Deep breaths. Stay conscious. Don’t give in to that sparkling darkness no matter how alluring. God knows what they’d do to me. I could hazard some pretty nasty guesses.
Over his shoulder, the leader said, ‘Take the boat and search the islands.’ Three men hurried to obey and with a smile he added to my captor, ‘Put her in the jeep. Not too gently. Show her what we do to whores. But save some for me.’
He turned and followed his men to the lakeshore. They’d dragged the boat into the water and one was seated in it, readying the oars. Another joined him while a third waited at the water’s edge.
‘We’ll take the woman back to the city,’ said the leader, ‘and return for you when we’ve delivered—’
His words were cut off by the sudden report from a gun and he dropped swiftly to a crouch. As did the soldier still on the shore. The men in the boat hunched as if wood was shield against speeding lead. I was dragged downwards by my captor so my knees banged hard on the ground and my air left me in a gust.
The sixth soldier had started towards the jeep. Anticipating the sport with the whore. But his eagerness would stay zipped in his pants because he was lying on the ground. Dead. A bullet hole in his skull.
The patrol leader’s eyes were incredulous as they fixed on him. He rose, slowly, gun waving before him like a shield to deflect bullets. To and fro. Searching for the assassin in the mist-swathed forest. Moving closer to the lakeshore and boat and the only means to escape an invisibly lurking death.
My captor followed, taking me with him. The boat scraped and splashes followed.
Toy soldiers all in a line on the shore.
They waved their guns. Searched the forest with radiograph stares, trying to find the assassin. I squeezed my eyes shut, opened them. Again and again until I could focus.
But the forest was silent. Still. A slight breeze and the branches of the trees grazed each other. The fog eddied then settled its arms more thickly around tree, scrub and hedge. A world dreamlike in its quiet opacity.
A crow cawed loudly and everyone jerked and one of the men swore. ‘There’s no one—’
The leader’s words were lost in another explosion and a red hole appeared like magic on his forehead. He dropped to the ground. Eyes wide. Feet drumming. Then still.
My captor moved closer to the water, determined to keep his prize. The remaining patrol members opened fire at nothing. At everything. Giving life to sticks and leaves that stippled the forest floor like rain.
I shook my head. Ears ringing. Head pounding. Fighting hard against nausea. All the time I prayed that the person doing the killing was a friend to me and that I wouldn’t be the next to die.
Another report, a short distance from the last, a whistle near my ear and a gentle crunching thud like pestle against mortar. My captor jerked and I whimpered and struggled against his hold, not sure if the bullet was meant for me or him. I was dragged to the ground with him half on top of me. Warm blood dribbled onto my cheek and I gagged and writhed and struggled from beneath him. Staying down. Just in case.
The remaining three soldiers ran for the jeep, spraying the forest, the trees, the sky as they went. Random bursts from their guns.
But as they neared the hedge, a man appeared with a handgun stretched before him. Fired.
Once. Twice. And two of the soldiers dropped.
The third swung his gun to the man and sprayed him with bullets. But the man was already moving and the bullets tore into the hedge and not flesh. The soldier followed, still firing, bellowing like a choleric bull.
A single gunshot. And the rattling machine gun stopped its one-sided conversation.
Got him.
My jubilance was tinged with apprehension and shrouded in pain. The knock to the head, the blood on my face smeared by shaking hands, the staring dead eyes and holes in skulls that oozed brains down grey faces all finally got to me and my stomach heaved its contents onto the ground while the sticks jagged into my palms and knees.
My vision cleared and the aching in my head lessened. I wiped my mouth and searched for the newcomer who’d saved my life but may just have saved me for last.
I found him. Walking towards me. Gun in his hand.
12
I SCRABBLED BACKWARDS in panic. A reprieve but maybe not. I knew I couldn’t get away from him because I had nowhere to go and he had the gun and his aim was infallible.
But the man spoke. ‘Don’t be afraid, I won’t hurt you. Only the Pack must die.’
I wasn’t convinced. Not really. But I reasoned that if he was going to kill me I’d already be dead.
Like the patrol.
He crouched next to me and took my head in his hands and examined my face. Then released me. He retrieved a handkerchief from his pocket, gave it to me and sat back on his haunches. ‘You’ll be fine. Can you stand? You’re in danger here.’
I didn’t respond. Just studied him while I wiped my face and tried to calm down. He was much younger than me but the lines of care and fatigue were the same I saw every time I looked in the mirror. There was blood on his neck and tears in the shoulder of his coat where bullets had grazed him. But there didn’t seem to be any actual holes in him.
His fingers followed my gaze to his neck and he grimaced as he touched the wound. ‘It’s fine,’ he said and pressed his hand against it.
‘You were lucky. They could have killed you.’
He shrugged. As if the tea shop had closed before he could buy tea but he didn’t really want it anyway. ‘Their aim wasn’t very good.’
‘Whereas yours is exceptional. Who are you?’
‘Soldier.’
‘From the city?’ He seemed familiar.
‘No, from the north, a guerrilla unit. I was fighting for your Leader.’
He was on my side. I could relax. ‘Were you part of the group stationed on the city’s outskirts?’ I named my district and when he nodded I did too. ‘I think I saw you there. Thank you. For fighting for us and for saving me today.’
He inclined his head. Devoid of conceit. ‘We did meet. Briefly. Before my unit was called to defend your Leader. Something at which we failed.’
‘That wasn’t your fault.’
‘Yes, but still…’ He shrugged. ‘It’s past and can’t be changed.’
Soldier rose and gazed around the forest, peering through the slowly lifting mist. ‘You should go back to the island. Other patrols may have heard the gunfire.’ He helped me to my feet and kept a hand on my arm to steady me.
‘You know about the island? Are you part of the resistance?’
‘Sort of. I resist in my own ways.’
When he let go of me, I held onto the boat, legs still shaking from reaction, head aching. ‘How did you know I was in trouble?’
‘I’m often in the forest. I like to keep watch over the island. To do my part. I saw you come and waited to see what you were doing. Then I saw the patrol. They couldn’t be allowed to know the location of the resistance’s base or there would be no base. And they couldn’t be allowed to take you because you’d be imprisoned like the other women. Like all…’ He stopped and frowned.
‘Like all the women…like…’ I studied his solemn face. ‘Did you ever meet my daughter? When you were stationed near our home?’ I said her name and he nodded.
‘Yes, I met her when she brought food to the camp, and at the hospital when I visited some men from my unit. She would give me an update on their condition.’
‘She and my other children helped at the hospital. She…I thought she died on the day we escaped but… but…’ I cleared my throat. ‘A friend told me they took her with them after…after they raped her. To be imprisoned…like the others…with the others…’
Photographs of Eldest in my mind. As a babe. A child. A woman. A long breath slowly released.
Soldier’s face was granite. Eyes full of rage. Those eyes moved to the patrol and his hand went to his gun. Revive them then kill them. Again. And again. Make them suffer as the women suffer. It was what I wanted to do too and in my eyes it marked him as a good man.
‘I thought she died,’ he said. ‘I thought everyone in your street died. I didn’t know…’ A twitch of brows that might have been surprise but may also have been grief. ‘I didn’t know they raped her.’
I nodded. ‘Some of us survived. Just me and Daughter from my family. Maybe Eldest.’
‘Did your friend say where they took her?’
I shook my head. Murmured a weary no. Because what did it matter now? She wouldn’t have survived. She couldn’t have. And so I told Soldier. ‘Which is probably for the best. To be held captive and…’
My words petered to silence, deep and barren. Then I said, ‘Will you come to Sanctuary? Rather than stay in the forest alone?’
‘No, I’ll remain here to watch. It’s better. The islands are easy to see, easy to find and to search. Someone needs to guard them or you may be discovered.’
One guard against the Pack. One deadly guard. Better than none.
Soldier followed my gaze as I glanced at the woman in the hedge. The smell had returned.
Soldier said, ‘There are many…too many to count. Bodies everywhere that the Pack have just left to rot. On the streets, in the forest, on the roadside…the smell…’ A bleak shake of his head. ‘They’ve dug pits, to bury not only the dead but sometimes the living. Sometime…sometimes they burn them alive. Just for fun.’
I gripped the edge of the boat hard and sank into a crouch. Then sat. And on an exhaled breath I thanked God that my family was killed by the Pack’s guns, not pushed living into a grave and set alight.
Left on a rubbish pile.
‘I am sorry for all you’ve lost,’ said Soldier. ‘Your husband and sons.’
A nod as I stared blindly at the grey forest with nothing to say.
‘Will you be alright to get back?’ said Soldier.
‘I just need to rest for a moment.’ Just need to get rid of the images that appeared with your words.
Soldier sat with me and our gazes joined in the forest. He listened and was wary while I was just numb.
Gradually my thoughts grew sharper and some of the trembling faded. I started to move because now that disaster had been averted I should go back to Daughter before she realised what I had done.
But Soldier put his hand on my arm. His finger was to his lips and behind it his mouth said, ‘Jeep,’ and he pointed. The sound so faint it was lost in the murmuring of the breeze.
Another patrol.
‘They probably heard the gunfire,’ he murmured and stood. ‘Go back to the island now. I’ll lead them away then return to hide the bodies and jeep.’
‘It’s too danger—’
But he was already padding away with silent steps.
I turned to the boat as panic rose again. Just as a figure emerged from the lake with barely a ripple of the fog-shrouded water. Then a second. I took a step away. Adrenaline tingled in my legs as I prepared to run, hand over my mouth to smother a scream.
Then I saw the faces.
Rescuer and Resolve.
I’d never been gladder to see anyone.
I could see immediately that Resolve was angry. She had a right to be. Rescuer just looked worried, which was normal for him; I don’t think he’d ever got angry at me. They were both wet. Shaking. Because I’d taken the only boat on this side of the island so they’d had to swim the icy distance between Sanctuary and the mainland.
‘What the hell were you thinking?’ said Resolve. Hair sodden. Water dribbling into her eyes. Pushed aside so she could glare at me properly.
I put my finger to my lips, mouthed, ‘Patrol.’
Resolve and Rescuer stilled. Instantly wary, crouching, gazing around, listening intently. Soldier had moved fast and was lost to the winter gloom of the forest. The jeep was distant now. Either he had diverted them or they’d taken a different direction to one that would lead them here.
When silence returned our breaths exhaled in white puffs of thankfulness.
‘That was lucky,’ said Resolve and her eyes moved over the forest. Widened when they encountered the bodies of the soldiers. She went to them, her hand on a gun shoved into her pocket, as waterlogged as the rest of her. Rescuer stared too. Then at me. He took my arms then touched my face.
‘Are you alright? You have blood on you and…’ He turned me to the light. ‘There’s a bruise. Did they hurt you?’
I pulled away. ‘I’m fine. One of them slapped me. I…’
‘Did you do this?’ Resolve turned disbelieving eyes to me.
‘No, there was a man here, a northerner from one of the guerrilla units. He killed the soldiers, then when he heard another patrol he went to lead them away so they didn’t find me or the island.’
Resolve walked along the lakeshore. Peering this way and that. ‘Well, he’s gone now.’ Another look, of doubt. As if I might have imagined him.
‘He was here.’ My gaze rested on the dead soldiers in satisfaction. ‘I couldn’t have done that even if I did have a gun. I wish I had. But I didn’t.’
‘Whoever did it,’ said Rescuer, ‘I’m glad you’re not badly hurt. You scared us half to death.’ Then he walked among the dead soldiers too.
‘Why did you come over here, Teller?’ said Resolve. ‘It was a dangerous thing to do. Rescuer has warned you—’
‘I don’t know but it’s done now and nothing has come of it.’ The words jumped out with anger that matched hers. My head ached. I felt stupid. Worse than that: guilty. I’d done the wrong thing and it wasn’t very noble to hide guilt behind anger but for now I wasn’t up to any magnanimous gestures of responsibility.
Rescuer came back to us. ‘The bullets were perfectly placed to kill. Looks like the work of a sniper, or a highly trained soldier. Not something Teller could have done.’
‘Then maybe we should wait for him to come back,’ said Resolve. ‘To thank him for rescuing Teller from her own lack of judgement.’
‘I don’t think that’s a very good idea, do you?’ I said primly. ‘Let’s just go. Like Rescuer said, Soldier knows what he’s doing.’
Resolve had a right to be angry. But she didn’t need to keep on with it. I’d meant it: it was done. It couldn’t be changed. I was alive and the soldiers were dead and that was all that mattered.
‘We need to cover the bodies,’ said Rescuer. ‘They’ll be like a signpost pointing to the island.’
I shook my head. About to tell him to leave them to Soldier. But I staggered as the hammers in my brain pounded out a new refrain. Resolve grabbed my arm, then the other. Studied my face.
